I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. About family. About what we are leaving behind for our children after we are gone. Are we leaving them a mess? Are we leaving them nothing? A legacy? Honestly, we are all leaving behind some kind of legacy for our children. The question is – what kind of legacy are we leaving? Are we leaving behind something that our children will be proud of and that have them telling everyone “This is what my parents built and it taught me…” *insert whatever it may have taught them*.
Everything nowadays tells us to think about ourselves, whether we have a family or not. While I did that for awhile, I would try to do what I wanted or what I thought I wanted, but that would blow up in my face and/or I would get rejected from what I thought would be my dream job. Most, if not all, of the jobs that I have had (some more than others) have completely torn me down and did not help me in any kind of way. Did they teach me things? Yes, of course they did. Mostly, they taught me how NOT to treat others. Did I like the jobs? Somewhat. For me, it wasn’t the job itself that I didn’t “enjoy”, it was how I was treated, the managers (and above) did not care about their employees. They had favorites on the “team”. There was no team at some of my jobs. I knew that I always wanted to own my own business, be my own boss. Not just sell something on social media for someone else. I wanted it to be for myself and for my family. Not going to some corporate business. But going to my family after I was gone.
While I still do some of those, I don’t actively promote them. I do still use them, but that is not how I want to build my “legacy” for my children. I want them to be proud of me, and not think that it was just something to do or something I had to do. I want my children to be able to look at me or think about me and say “My mom (and dad) built this for me. They did this for me because they love me…” and you know all the great things that children should be saying about their parents.
My daughter has told me that she hated me before, because I told her “no” about something. While I knew she didn’t REALLY mean it. She probably meant it in the moment, but not in the big picture. She is still young, and this was a year or two ago.
As I have gotten older and learned more things as a mom and what I’ve seen in different companies that I have worked for, I decided that that was not what I wanted for my kids. I was miserable in my job. While the pay may have been decent (still not enough haha), I was literally miserable. And my kids saw it, they knew how much I hated going and how miserable I was. When your own kids can see that….that is not something that I want to pass down to my children. Even though you may not be happy in your job, doesn’t mean you quit right away (because no one can afford to), until you have something else lined up…but you work to get something else, something better. Something that will better you and your family.
I feel like everyone is always telling me what I can and can’t do. And it’s been getting on my nerves, as I’m sure it does to everyone else. There was a quote that I heard earlier by Dolly Parton – “To those that say it can’t be done, would you please stop interrupting those of us that are doing it?” Now, I don’t know if it is actual quote from Dolly, but it is so true. I’ve been told so many times, by multiple people, that I can’t do certain things. I’m not just talking about jobs and such. I’ve had people tell me “Oh, 2 kids is enough, you/they don’t need to have anymore.” While yes and no, it is our decision whether we choose to have more kids or not. Yes, we decided that we are happy with our two, that doesn’t mean that we could’ve changed our mind and had more. Because honestly, it is none of their business. It is my family, not theirs. I want to be the mom, I want my kids to want me and their daddy.
So I looked up that quote, the quote is “”People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it,” by George Bernard Shaw. But I did hear it from Dolly Parton in a movie, called “Christmas in Dollywood”! You should watch it!
Anyway, I’m kind of going on a rampage. But it does sort of go along with what I started with. Don’t let others get you down for what you want to do with your life for YOUR family. I have had so many interests and passions, but nothing that I could really leave as a legacy for my children. Right now, they would probably say something like “My mom liked doing a lot of things, but she didn’t really know what she wanted to do. Except be a mom.” While I LOVE being a mom, and that is a great legacy to leave behind – I want to leave more than that behind for my kids. As we all know, it doesn’t exactly “pay the bills” by being a mom. Unfortunately. There are so many rewards to being a mom though. It really is the best thing in the world.
I’m almost done, I promise! While writing is a passion of mine (obviously haha), I do have other passions. And I am working on them. But something I’ve learned – is don’t tell people things until after it’s done, or at least in the works. And that is what I’ve been doing and plan on doing from now on! So be on the lookout for some exciting things, Lord willing!
Thank you for following along on my journey! Also, I do plan on writing more! 🙂
