Being a stay-at-home mom – why? And why does it get so much shame from other people? Good question! I have always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. Not because I didn’t want to work. I still want to be able to work from home and have an income while staying home with my children. But even though many moms nowadays are staying home with their kids while making money to take care of their husband and kids, they still get shamed. And it’s ridiculous, in my opinion. Everyone thinks that moms who stay home with their kids while the husband goes to work every day to provide for their family (whether the mom makes money at home or not), that they do nothing at home all day.
Well, guess what? Moms do EVERYTHING at home. They clean the house, they do the dishes, they do the laundry, they take care of the dogs (if there are any), they take care of the children, they cook the food. Is that called nothing to everyone? Plus, all while saving money by not having the children in childcare/daycare. Because trust me, I used to work in a daycare, multiple actually, and they are not cheap. It would take most of one of the spouses paycheck, so basically it would be like living on one income, anyway.
Not everyone knows everyone’s situation. But for a very long time, just because of the way things worked, we didn’t see our kids much during the week, because I had gone from part-time to full-time at my job. Because we thought we were going to have a friend of ours help. Well, that friend kinda bailed on us, and I was already full-time at my job, so we had to figure out something quick. Well, my in-laws offered to watch them, which was great and everything, but because of how it worked out, they kept them during the week, and we got them on the weekends because my husband didn’t work on Saturdays, so even if I did work, he would be home with them. Don’t get me wrong, we are thankful to our in-laws for keeping them, but it was very hard on us. Very hard.
Well, we missed having our kids home during the week. We were tired of being weekend parents and literally feeling like ‘grandparents’ almost. We didn’t even feel like we were a mom or a dad anymore. Literally. Is that how a parent is supposed to feel? NO! I did not feel like I was a mom, even though I am one. We barely saw our kids. Yes, we could go see them, but with how expensive gas was/is, and how early my husband gets up for work, we didn’t want to get the kids up that early. That’s why we had the plan in the previous paragraph.
So a little bit ago, I decided to stay home. Talked to my husband about it, we both agreed. I have things I’m working on on the side, which I will talk about in other blog posts, but that is for another blog post! Not this one! 🙂 I could go on and on about what I’ve heard and seen people say about stay-at-home moms. And now that I am one (not my first time but still), I can’t take it. Moms do SO much. For their kids. For their husbands while away at work.
I want to be the kind of stay-at-home mom, that with my side hustles and the money I make from them, to be able to take the kids out during the day, to the park, to a bookstore, to wherever the kids want to go for a little while. And on the weekends, it’s hard because that’s when everyone goes and it’s a lot more busier. I want to be able to spend TIME with my family. Because TIME is something we cannot get back. And we already missed 9-10 months of that, and we are not doing that again. It killed me. I would literally break down to my husband and just cry because we missed our kids. Yes, we could facetime them, but that is not how we want to see our own kids.
So yes, I’m making a blog about stay-at home moms, because we need to stop the mom-shaming. If a mom stays home with her kids, she gets shamed for not helping financially. If a mom goes to work full-time, she gets shamed for not spending more time with her kids. Are you getting it yet? Long story short – there is no pleasing everyone. So do what is best for you and your family. Don’t worry what everyone else thinks you should be doing. They are not you. They don’t know what is best for you and your family.
Yes, we need to get a house, we currently live in a trailer. But I would rather have that time with my kids, and have to wait a little longer to get a house. As I said earlier, time that I’ve missed with my kids, I will never get that back. There will always be a house at some point, that we can get. I’d rather have that time with my kids and with my family. It irks me when someone mentions something about working and uses that tone and gives me that look because they know that I stay home now. Like, yes, I may not be working right now, but I am spending time with my kids. And that is fine with me.
What is a Stay-at-home mom? It is “someone who may or may not have left the workforce to stay home and raise her children. She may be highly educated and left a six-figure job to stay home. She may be planning on returning to the workforce once her children are older.” No, I didn’t even leave a six-figure job to stay home, if I did, then I’m sure I could definitely find a way to still work that job from home. But anyway, not the point. Is it a sacrifice? Yes. Is it a worthy sacrifice? Also, yes. Do we need to mom-shame those who stay home with their kids? NO. We need to stop it. Right. Now. Do we feel guilty sometimes for not working full-time outside the home for a semi-stable paycheck? Maybe. But we do not regret the time spent with our kids.
To be able to enjoy these moments with my kids, is everything. And I would not trade it for anything. I have the cutest kids! I have the most beautiful family! Not that I’m biased or anything! 😛
This picture was taken last year, but I’m so grateful for my little family!❤️
Adventures Of Motherhood 